The Catchpenny Post

So, I’m already a huge Kevin Durant fan. This commercial does nothing if not further solidfy my high opinion of him. Sure, some claim that it perpetuates stereotypes and what-not. But damn, it’s pretty awesome. And DJ Quik no less…

Is it as good as some of the Lebron stuff? No. But what is?

What the hell is going on after the fall here???  I don’t know which is funniest:  the fall, the weird-ass sounds she makes after falling, or the newscasters talking afterwards?  All in all, this is great stuff.

Looking at the expansive variety of commercials that Geico is running at one time (talking gecko, cavemen, used-up celebrities, etc.), I realized that it’s pretty rare for anything other than a beer company to do so…  And then, they throw this one out there.  Freakin’ brilliant stuff.  “When it comes to Mike Wallace, the story ends with me putting him in the wall.”

I have an idea for what I think would be a great television show.  If anyone knows any big-time television producers, get me in contact and I will give you a cut of my BIG MONEY!!!!

 Here is the jist:

It will be titled, “The Bachelor…Polygamist Edition”

First, I will find America’s most eligable Polygamist bachelor and some beautiful Polygamist women who are looking for love.  The twist is…rather than just the normal “20 women narrowed down to 1″…my show will start with 200 women, and we will narrow them down to 20!  THAT’S RIGHT AMERICA!!!  THIS WILL BE THE FIRST REALITY SHOW WHERE THE LUCKY BACHELOR GOES HOME WITH 20 WOMEN!!!

Get ready…this is going to be big!!!  Will you be watching???

How many of your friends call a 7 an 8.5?  Rules of a 10 point scale with 10 being perfect:

1. Nothing is perfect so there are no 10’s
2.  9 is almost unattainable so it should be reserved for only for the top of the bell curve
3. Don’t disrespect the curve by calling a 7 an 8, a 7 is a 7
4. Personality is not part of the scale
5. If a women calls another women a 7 she’s really a 5.5 (women scoring women - automatically deduct 1.5 points)
6. Never take a 5 out in public
7. Finally no matter what your buddy says two 5’s don’t make a 10

With a budget of almost 6 million and grossing around 2 million, this movie might be a bigger flop than Waterworld.  The only star in this movie besides Rob “vanilla ice” Vanwinkle is Naomi Campbell.  I still  remember watching this movie.  It wasn’t good.

Bottom line…any tech geek that is caught writing or distributing a computer virus should be water-boarded…

There are many reasons to hate the N.Y. Yankees, but here is mine.  The Florida Marlins have a 30 man starting roster with a combined pay of 21.8 million.  “Overpaid” Alex Rodriguez makes 28 million a year (almost 7 mill more than the entire marlins team).  Three players from the Yanks make more than the entire marlin team.  In the last 5 years this has gotten the N.Y. Yankees O championships, yet the underpaid Florida Marlins have won Twice.

Debued in 1991 Gerardo was know as the Latin Elvis.  His song Rico Suave peaked at No. 36 on the billboard chart.  Probably the first song known for “spanglish”.

So… the lady and I decide that we want to do a quick/convenient dinner last Tuesday night.  It was the evening that bad storms swept through and the area flooding made turned the usual 15 minute commute into several hours, so the last thing either of us was looking for was any attempt at cooking or any more time wasted waiting in a line - so we opted for the fast food fix that is Taco Bell.

 Well the sons-a-bitches did something wrong and hooked me up with a fat case of food poisoning.  For those of you that have never experienced it, I liken it to someone forcing liquid draino down your throat and shaking up your intestines with an egg beater.  I couldn’t keep liquids down for almost 24 hours and wasn’t able to actually eat for almost 48 hours.  It wasn’t until Friday afternoon that I felt even close to normal again.

I hate you.

 Wtf?  I mean, seriously.  I know it’s my own damn fault for allowing myself to ingest crap that I know full well probably doesn’t meet the lowest level of the food pyramid - but how many people a day does this monstrosity serve?  And how important to their well being is it that their (admittable low-grade) food at least not sicken or kill people?  You’d think that would be the most important factor to them since the general population is already incredibly suspect of their food quality.

 Regardless, never, never again will I eat anything from their establishment.  Quite frankly I’m a little suspect of the entire Yum! brands franchise now (though I eat at Long John’s, KFC, A&W, and Pizza Hut even less than I did Taco Bell).  Screw them all.  They’re all dead to me…